Longing to move away...

I was born in Canada and raised in Michigan. For those unfamiliar with geography you just cross some water from Michigan and you are in Canada.  I moved 5 times before I reached the 6th grade.

I can't say that I had a horrid childhood. It was amazing in A LOT of ways... not so much fun in other ways.. but we live in a fallen world so we can't expect perfection! But I can say I always had a longing to be somewhere else. Which is weird.. you would think with all of my moving I would just want to stay where I was. Yet I always dreamed of moving to the beach or at least to a southern state where the weather was nicer. I longed to move away...

In elementary school I learned about the underground railroad and was proud of being born in a country where slaves ran to find freedom. I was proud to live in a state that was so beautiful. (Even if I disliked the snow that covered the ground more than half of the year) Even with my attachment to my place of birth and State I was raised in, I still had a longing to be somewhere else.

I went on mission trips starting when I was 16 and continue to do so now at the age of 27 (leaving for Haiti June 22nd this year) I had/have a heart to travel and share God's love with the nations.

Going on my first mission trips I learned that I wasn't called to be a full time missionary in the sense of moving out of the country. I knew God was calling me to work with young people... I just didn't know where.. This longing to move away wasn't answered yet...

I had an amazing time at Mount Hope Church in Lansing Michigan. I served there for years as a volunteer youth leader, and did an intense Summer internship.. yet something in me knew I wouldn't be there forever.. I longed to move away...

I took a job less than an hour away as a full time Youth Pastor. I felt God calling me to minister there. I thought maybe my longing to move away wasn't from God and was my own selfishness...

After about 2 years of ministry in that church with my fiance' and then husband. God obviously without a doubt sent us to a children's home in SW VA. Something I totally didn't expect to happen I had been trained to be a youth pastor. I have a 4 year degree in youth ministry. Why would God ask me to be a house parent in a children's home?

The location was beautiful. The job went really well at first. Then within 6 months I was going crazy. I thought oh no.. we picked up and moved left everything we knew all of our family and friends. Why would we be sensing God moving us after such a short time? The longing to move was still there...

We found out after a year at the children's home that God had sent us there to bring us to the church we now both serve in. (It was just down the road from the children's home)

For the first time in my life.. I have a longing to stay.... I have no desire to move away. I have no desire to find a warmer climate. (even when the snow comes and it gets cold in these mountains)

I don't know how long God has called me here for. I pray its for a long time. I didn't imagine raising my kids in this type of community. I always saw myself raising them in a big city. Working with inner city students with a church.

I now hope I am here long enough to raise my children in this community and in this church.

My ministry here at the church isn't perfect. I'm not perfect. Its not always easy in fact its not really easy at all. Though, It is absolutely where I know God wants me to be. I long to stay. I miss the family who lives so far away from me. I miss seeing my nephew's and niece grow up.

Yet I long to stay...

Its not okay to just be you.

Whoa wait a minute Suzie didn't your last entry say just the opposite?


My last entry focused more on not being fake. Not putting on a show.


Today I want to get you thinking on what John 3:30 means


"He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less."


What about "2 Corinthians 5:17
"This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!"


Those are just 2 scriptures that remind us to not be us. But to be like Christ.


We are naturally sinful, broken, selfish people. We need to seek to be like Christ instead of just being ourselves.


How many cards or signatures in a year book have you seen 
written:  " You are awesome! Never change" 


What a crazy thing to say! "Never change?!" Who would never 
want to change? 


Only someone perfect would want to stay the same. 


Don't use excuses for yourself or others "well thats just they way I am" 


There are some things I can't control. Like my learning disability, my poor eyesight etc. 


There are other things I can control, how I treat people, where I spend my money, how honest I am etc. 


But if you know me at any depth you will know that I'm a fallen creature just as you are. Anything good that is in me is Christ. I don't want to be just me. I'm not okay with just being me. I want to be like Jesus. 

Who are you?

So many go through life trying to be someone else to please someone else.

How many girls pretend to enjoy sports or a certain team because the boy the like is into it?

How many boys end up hurting themselves as they try to do some amazing stunt that they don't really want to do... just to impress a girl?

How many people pretend to enjoy certain types of music, television shows, or video games so they can fit in with the crowd?

What a miserable life to live.. one of pretending...

I was a bit of a tomboy growing up.. I enjoyed getting messy outside, climbing trees, catching frogs and snakes and turtles.

As I got older I became the person who didn't want or need doors opened for me I could do it myself. I didn't need anyone to take care of me I could handle myself. I wasn't afraid of going to the store in the middle of the night in a dangerous part of the city. I always volunteered to help carry things and move large things. (I was physically stronger back in the day than I am now) I didn't see it at the time but it was a form of pretending on my part.

I thought it was something to be proud of that I was tough and not super girly. But what I've learned as I've matured and grown closer to God in the process is God created me to be a woman and he specifically made men and women differently.

I can still enjoy outdoors and my frogs and snakes. But if someone is going to open a door for me I now let them.  There's a reason God made women so complex and relational. We too are created in His image and we showcase different aspects of God. Instead of trying to be as tough as any guy or extremely independent. I should just be me. God created us to live in community so trying to be independent and doing it myself isn't how God created us.

Ladies don't be afraid to be feminine, in the Biblical sense of the word. These are the happiest, most fulfilled ladies on the earth.

Feminine doesn't mean putting a dress on and sipping tea. You can be feminine as you ride your quad around in the mud or sit sewing a dress. Being Feminine is much more than our likes and our tastes its our core being.

Some direction from scripture to us ladies.

Titus 2:3-5 


Similarly, teach the older women to live in a way that honors God. They must not slander others or be heavy drinkers. Instead, they should teach others what is good. ⁴ These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, ⁵ to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God.


Now I could start writing about how men don't need to fear that loving their families or being a Godly man will make them less masculine. But I'm going to wrap this post up. 


I'm so thankful that I don't have to pretend with my husband or my friends. I can be who I am and they accept me faults and all. I pray that we all can live in the freedom of who God made us to be. That we don't have to act tough.. or act at all. 


In order to know who you are. You must know who created you, and know your purpose in life. Those answers are not difficult to find once you start searching. 

Christmas on Sunday?

What does Christmas mean to you? When I first heard that Christmas was on a Sunday I have to admit one of the thoughts that went through my head was... "well that will change my Christmas traditions".

This is actually a good thing for my husband because his family tradition was opening presents on Christmas Eve which I don't think I could ever get used to! Its Christmas morning for me!! When we found out that Christmas was on a Sunday this year I told him that every time Christmas is on a Sunday we can do it his way. So this year presents will be opened on Christmas eve.

There are some traditions he will get to keep from his family. Like Ben being able to read the Christmas story before presents are opened.

I met a girl a few years ago at a youth leadership summit. I want to share her facebook status from today with you. I agree with her wholeheartedly.

"First day of December and excited that this Christmas falls on a Sunday! What a special day to lay aside our traditions and not focus on our normal busy holiday routine. What a great opportunity to share with our children that it's not about running to the tree and opening gifts, but running to His house and seeing the true gift we were blessed with on this day? What an awesome day to make this a "He" day, not a "Me" day. I plan on kneeling at the throne of my King first thing this Christmas, not our Christmas tree." -Denise Sites 


I pray that each Christian this Christmas would be able to agree with the statement above. 


I heard of a church that decided to do 2 Christmas eve services and not hold church on Sunday Christmas day. It broke my heart and made me a little angry actually. 


I wonder how many churches will not hold service on the day we celebrate our Savior's birthday? Most come on the Sunday we celebrate his resurrection. Why wouldn't you want to come the day we celebrate God coming to earth? 


I'm guessing its because its hard to give up traditions. Please put aside your traditions and worship God with your church family. If you are visiting family for Christmas join them for church. 


Christmas is a Christian Holiday celebrating the day the God of the universe came down to live among us. Celebrating the birth of the man who died so that we could live. 


What are we telling the world if Christians skip church this Christmas? 

Thanksgiving

I was born in Canada and my mom is a Canadian citizen. I grew up celebrating Thanksgiving twice a year. Once in October in Canada and the other in November in the U.S. What I loved about that is that we would get the Turkey in October and we would often get to have homemade italian food for our American Thanksgiving as we celebrated our Italian heritage from my dad's side of the family.


This year is a very happy Thanksgiving for me. I am blessed with an amazing job and church. We have seen God do miracles. We are celebrating those miracles this Sunday in a special service actually!


My parents and youngest sister are driving now as I type to visit Ben and I and our new dog Max. Allison has never been here in SW Virginia. My parents haven't been here since I've had this position with the church. So I am excited to share with them a bit of my life here.


I am sad that they can't stay longer. I am sad that my dad has a bone in his knee that is badly bruised. Which means no long walk's or hikes which is one of my favorite parts of living in the Blue Ridge Mountains.


My brother-in-law lost his job not too long ago. A friend of mine lost a baby and a grandfather not too far apart. Another friend/co-worker has recently found out that her 12 year old son has type 1 diabetes.


There is time a to mourn, there is a time to be sad/angry. But in the situation we can still be thankful. As my amazing pastor pointed out this past Sunday.


 1 Thessalonians 5:18 "Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."


It's not give thanks FOR all circumstances, its give thanks IN all circumstances. Praying for those who are doing their best to be Thankful in the storm this holiday season. 


Thanksgiving started 3,000 years before the pilgrims landed over here on the Mayflower.


God told His people, the children of Israel, the people who were true believers, I want you to set aside a day in the fall.  It was called the Feast of Weeks or the Harvest Festival, at which they would bring an offering to God, express their thanks to God, share a banquet or a meal together.  

Thanks and Giving go together. Lets be thankful by giving back to the one who has given us so much. 

Ambassador?

What does it mean to be an Ambassador?

Well according to Webster it means:

1. : an official envoy; especially : a diplomatic agent of the highest rank accredited to a foreign government or sovereign as the resident representative of his or her own government or sovereign or appointed for a special and often temporary diplomatic assignment

    2 : an authorized representative or messenger

What does it mean to be an Ambassador for Christ? 2 Corinthians 5:20a So we are Christ's ambassadors; 

As the leadership of our church have recently been discussing this. I thought I would share some of my thoughts. 

We are to represent Christ to those here on earth. The Bible tells us this is not our home we are visitor's and foreigners here. We are to be showing the people Christ and the Kingdom of God as we represent Him with our life. 

What happens when we live in our flesh? When we live by our own desires and make this place our home and forget that we are only passing through? 

^{Galatians 5: 19} When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, ²⁰ idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, ²¹ envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.

This passage referes to each one of us at some point. We've all had outbursts of anger, been selfish, jealous or envious, quarreled etc. 

Christ's Ambassador's cannot live that kind of a life. That is not representing Christ and His Kingdom. 

^{Galatians  5: 22} God's Spirit makes us loving, happy, peaceful, patient, kind, good, faithful, ²³gentle, and self-controlled.

Lets strive for those character traits in verses 22-23. Being an Ambassador for Christ starts in the home and unfortunately sometimes those closest to you do not get the most patient, kind, and self-controlled you. 

God wants to help us! Lets allow Him to live and work through us today and every day! 

Day 4 & 5 in Haiti

On the 4th day we taught at a church in the city. It was a much different atmosphere. It was a newer church and they were very eager to learn and ready for a change. It was an indescribable feeling that we had as we realized that God was doing something big here and that he was using us. We were used at the very beginning of a great change in Haiti. 

The children could not fit in the meeting area to do our children's ministry. So the pastor took us to the yard of some people down the street. We did not stay there for much more than an hour because we were separated from our team and wanted to keep everyone safe. The children then followed us back to the church and got their nails painted as they quietly waited for the adults to finish. These children were much more well behaved. The translator you will see pictured below with me were taking care of the children. They were orphans and we complemented him on their behavior. 

Below is some pictures of the church in the city. 

Below is Camp Abraham a displacement camp. You can see they have moved up from tents to wooden structures.   

 Below is their water tanks that were empty. There was no well or water nearby either.

They were still in a crisis mode so we helped give out food. We do not give handouts with the way we do missions. Unless they are in a crisis mode and camp Abraham was. 

We hope to have someone come and live in the camp to have their own garden and harvest rain water then teach by example.  When we shared this with the leader of the camp he thought it was a good idea. When we go back to Haiti Camp Abraham may be one of our priorities. 

After visiting camp Abraham we went downtown to see the damage of the earthquake. It had been around 18 months and not much had changed. Still everyone in tents. No buildings really being repaired yet. It has a lot to do with their government or lack there of. A new president has been recently elected and there is some hope there. 

This is their capital building (the palace) Still in ruins 

A few of us got out of the car to take pictures of it. A man came up to us and told us that we dont' need to see that they call it "the house of the devil" there was a large sense of distain toward the government there. But again hope with this new president. A few seconds later the horn honked from our van and he was telling us to get back in because its not safe to be on the streets downtown. (Our teens stayed in the van with driver, Brian and another team member)

A catholic church that got destroyed

On our way to downtown we were told to put our camera's away because there were "gangsters" everywhere and it was very dangerous. Our driver then stopped for gas right in the middle of the "gangster" area. Lets just say we were thankful for the UN men at the gas station! Here are a few more pictures of the downtown area.